About the Book

Becoming a bride or a mother is a joyous occasion; becoming a widow is not.
It’s painful, frightening and lonely.

The U.S. Census Bureau estimated that over 1,000,000 women became widows in 2015. Widowhood is indifferent to the circumstances and dreams of those it affects—women of all ages, backgrounds and circumstances. Being widowed is often a harrowing experience in itself. Living through the ensuing grief is daunting and painful, and establishing a new life is challenging.

Although women who have lost a spouse share the common attribute of being a widow, each is a unique individual with an even more unique story. Widows may suffer common feelings and fears, but each widow must find her own solace, coping, and creating a new life.

While many “widow” books have been written by trained professionals, and a few by individual—often prominent—widows offering guidance or instruction on how to survive being a widow, Widows – Our Words and Ways is unique in that it contains twenty-six compelling first-person narratives, from a diverse group of widows from all walks of life.

Each of these everyday wonder women is special in her own right, with her own inspiring story to tell in her own words.

These are women of various ages from diverse ethnic, racial, religious, educational and economic backgrounds, who became widows under different circumstances, and whose personal histories and situations differ wildly. Women who were widowed as young as twenty-one years old and women widowed in their sixties; widows with children and without; widows whose spouses died after prolonged illness and widows whose spouses died suddenly. Each of these women has suffered the pain of widowhood. Each has survived it in her own way, by finding her own sources of support and resources to move forward, at some point, with her life. 

Why did I write this book? Because I personally experienced the need for such a book.

I became a widow in 1990 when I was forty-six years old and had two small sons, ages thirteen and eleven. Other than my two sons, I had no immediate family. I searched, but could find no bereavement groups for young widows. I did not find support in religion. I found some support from friends, work colleagues and personal therapy, but it always gnawed at me that there were then no support groups, resources or books for young or non-stereotypical widows such as myself. In 2016, having retired after practicing law for forty-nine years, I thought the time was appropriate that I now address my desire to help grieving widows, whoever they may be.